Things I found in a public washing machine...

4 and a half year spent in Universiti Teknologi Malaysia is a long time.

And having the luxury of vending washing machine provided in every dormitory gives me the privilege of weird experience.

The culture of using the washing machine was on a first come, first serve basis. However, in the occasion where the previous user is not on site and the machine has finish the cycle, the next user has the right to take the cloths out of the washing machine and put it in the previous user's pail, laundry basket or on the floor if none is found.

After taking out all the cloths, most of the times, there are weird things left in the machine as a result of not taking those things out before washing their cloths. Sometimes the machine is not used but there are stuffs left because the previous user fail to notice them after taking all their laundries.

Based on my experience, I had the "privilege" to find these stuffs in the washing machine before usage. These items can be divided into a few categories:

Stationary
1. Scissors
2. Punchers

3. A bottle of starch glue
4. Table calendar

5. Scientific Calculator (Brand new and still in the packaging box)

6. Printer ink

7. Magnifying Glass
8. Mouse Pad

Electric Appliances
1. Computer Mouse
2. Table phone handle

3. A few keys from a computer keyboard

4. Water heater

5. A Wifi Modem (Stolen as it has the university's logo printed on it)

6. An Astro remote control

7. An electric pencil sharpener (I wanted to put it under the stationary category but since it is battery powered, I put it here)

Cooking Utensils
1. A pair of tongs

2. A small frying pan

3. A half empty bottle of cooking oil (And the machine was a bit oily and NO I did not use that machine later on, EVER AGAIN!)
4. An egg tray (Plastic)
5. Some forks (OMG cant imagine how the cloths came out after spinning with the forks)


Sports Equipments
1. A left side of a football boot
2. A baton

3. A half inflated rugby ball
4. An arrow


Weird Attires
1. A pair of brassier (In a guy's dromitory???????)

2. G-string (not matching the brassier above)
3. Condoms (And its USED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) Hell yeah, I NEVER WENT NEAR THAT MACHINE EVER!!!

4. A chicken costume

5. An Ultraman Mask

Just Stuffs
1. A plastic chair's leg
2. A small flower pot

3. A door handles

A lost drop of blood...

Dear beloved...

I'm so sorry. I don't even deserve your forgivness.

I did what I think I had to do at that time. Now, your absence finally hit me. I think I just felt your lost now because I had to be strong last time. I ha to be strong for her. In fact its only now that I trully think "Dear God... What have I done?"

This sin I've commit can never be erased. I took everythg away from you.

I tried hard. Very very very hard to forget you. I cant. How can I?

You've always been with me. In me. You are me.

I pray one day. If ever I meet you in the after life. I'll be able to recognize.you and hopefully you'll accept me in your arms.

"J"....

A broken knot... Part 2

"As children bring their broken toys,
With tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken heart to God,
Begging He'll bring back my friend,

Instead of letting Him to work in peace,
I tried to help and increase the pace,
At last I cried out loud to God,
How could you be so slow?

"My child, my child" He said,
What could I do? You never let go."

Being the human nature that we are, we were granted the grace of HOPE. A faint hope that our best friend my someday return to our side and re-live the once sweet memories. We never really let go. Ever.


Its a painful chapter in our lives, YES! But the soothing memories always comfort the deep pain, the dark pain. It kills me to see even her name before because of the reminder of that deep pain.



No matter how much I force myself to let her go,
No matter how much I force myself to stop thinking about her,
No matter how much I force myself to avoid her,
No matter how much I force myself to forget her,
No matter how much I force myself to hate her,
Eventually, its her touch that kept me going...



And that's why I'll always love her.



You know who you are... ^_^

A broken knot...

Many, I believe, has been let down by their best friends at least once in their life. And the feeling...

No one can exactly describe how painful it is.


Broken
Abandoned
Betrayed
Hopeless
Vulnerable
Lost
Anguish
Alone

I'm not proud to say I've been through this situation. It was an emotional hell for me. In my case, she knew something was wrong. But what breaks me was, she never went the extra mile to try to reach out to me.

Most of the time, their reason will be...


Is this a feasible excuse?
Can you accept this?
Aren't we as busy as they are? Probably more?

When we are at our life limit,
When there is no more line to hold on,
When life itself crumble bit by bit,

Can you accept the word "busy"?

Best Friend: "I'm sorry. I'm so busy right now. I'm swamped. My hands are full, my hair is full. I know you'll understand. You've been through my situation too right?"

And then we back down for awhile. Decaying in the brokenness of our life after being pushed away. A few days later,

Us: "Hi there, can we meet? I kinda need to talk to you about something"

Best Friend: "Sorry, I have a meeting tonight. Tomorrow there is this thing. The next day, I got a plan. How about we meet for dinner? Natalie and Hailey will be joining cause I cant drive"

Us: "Its ok. Maybe next time"

What part of "I kinda need to talk to you about something" you don't understand that it is something personal to talk to? And yes, we back down again, keeping the thing inside us eating us alive inside out.

Waking up every morning seems heavier and heavier. Dragging our legs behind with every fake face we wear. Until we can no longer hold on, we fall into the emptiness. Knowing that someone we stood up for in their times of need, simply push us aside because they were busy.


There are 5 stages of a broken friendship...


The first is denial. The first reaction this loss. This stage can last a few hours, days, or even a few weeks. "She really is busy. Her works are up her and there. Its just for the time being. Later, I'll try to get her when she's not" Then you knew she went out with someone else. "They needed my help. I promised them already. They're our friend too" We accept their excuses.

For me, I tried to deny i for about 2 weeks. Then it hit me! Eventually we'll ask ourselves "I also need your help, my life is breaking down now. I tried to make an appointment with you and you were too busy but you can promise other people? They're our friend too but I though I am you best friend."

"I thought I am your best friend?"


The second stage is anger. The numbness wears off and the painful realization of the loss hits full-force. We feel angry. Lashes out at ridiculously trivial things.

For me, it was a horrible period. Most will feel regret for depending on their once best friend. Trying to fully forget that person, some, to the extend of forcing themselves to hate their best friend. Yes! To that extend.

This later evolves into a much darker emotion. One that can lead to suicide...


Despair.

"Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?"

The storm of intense emotions of the second stage gives way to a period of heavy sadness, silence and withdrawal from family and friends. This is a dangerous period. Often if not attend to, does have a high possibility to commit suicide.

I'll be lying if I say I didn't think of that. Its like a disease, constantly plaguing my mind. My exact thinking was "If my best friend treats me this bad, what more to say others? Those whom I barely know. Might as well I don't live this painful life"


After 2 months, it all just seems pointless. Everything just seems numb. But at least you can start to smile.

It took me a very long time to get to this point because the magnitude of the pain I felt was just devastating. Things will look up from here. Most will try to start a new life. Forgetting the past. And then...


Its time. Its time to let go...

Its best to let go of those who doesn't have time for you when you are decaying fast. Depending on them might be fatal one day. I got to this point almost 3 months later. It has a weird calmness. Its like you've finally forgive yourself for making the wrong choice of friend.

You've finally made peace with your inner demon...

And what remain is a broken chapter in your life, sadly sealed off so that you won't have to feel pain anymore with a special lock...

a broken heart...

The big question here is,




I'll answer with this poem...

As children bring their broken toys,
With tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken heart to God,
Begging He'll bring back my friend,

Instead of letting Him to work in peace,
I tried to help and increase the pace,
At last I cried out loud to God,
How could you be so slow?

"My child, my child" He said,
What could I do? You never let go.

Hands that will always warm my heart from afar...

HAMAGASH! After 3 days, this tribute is finally finnished! For all graduating nest sem...

Its been 3-4 years since d first I meet u guys... Its been a long journey since then. Most of you I had the privileged to spend more times than others. I have very terrible memory but I'll try my best. I'll honor each and everyone of you graduating students in no particular order...


Patricia my Forgotten Friend.

Can't seem to remember much when we first met but DEAR GOD! You'll always stay in my heart, in my mind. A few of our friend knew what we've been through. Though mostly our communication is limited to only FB Chat and occasional karaoke session, we both know there's so much more.

I remembered there was 1 night I was so depressed, I think it was a few months ago. I had no one to talked to so I open FB around 1am. U were there, u chat with me. I knew u were kinda busy but still u didn't push me away. Thank you for the support u gave me through my difficult times. I can never repay those debts. Here's something for you, Pat...

Most pushed me away, u stayed beside though..
Most swept me under the rugs, u supported me through.
A neglected present u are, I'm so sorry.
Never far from my mind, you'll always be.



Rina the cute Rabbit!

Most memories I can dig out was when we were under 1 dept for Publicity. ahahahahaha... It started quite bad rite. But I think, it was fun. Everytime I see you, I'm reminded of a cute rabbit. Don't get mad please... ahahahha I want to apologize if ever I offended u in any ways during these 4 years. I also want to apologize for not making much time to hang out with you...

All the best in life, Little Rabbit!



Carlvin the Gay Boy!

Memories with u, flows like the rivers of Babylon in my short term memory. Ahahahahha... I actually hate u the first time I met u. U look kinda nerdy, weak and arrogant Gay boy. Thats what made me took more time to break the ice with u compared to the others. Of course, eventually I saw the real you.

And I really love you. Although u always push me away, I don't mind cause u're my little gay bro. I'm supposed to love u no matter what rite? We've been through SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many things together. Pilgrimage, Mersing Punggek family day, Johor Lama Punggek Family day just to name a few. What the HELL, we even got to BOTB twice!

Just wanna say, it was an honor to know u, to be in your presence and to grow in faith with you. Take care lil bro! I love u so much!



Damian the Dependable!

Dear Damian, a big baby boy. so cute, always smiling and i SERIOUSLY MEAN IT when I say ALWAYS SMILING! I think that I began to know you through 21st Gift dinner. We had a bit of misunderstanding during that dinner but I knew I had to choose u because you can deliver.

Your words are as good as COMPLETE! Its difficult to trust someone with an extraordinary task but I feel if its you, I wont have to worry. We had many great times too. SALT 1, OMG! You were there when "Punggeknisation" was founded. The last I can remember is Johor Lama Punggek Family day. No doubt, you are one of the rare pearl on the vast beach! All the best in life, Dam!



Sapel the Superman

Sorry handsome boy, xda la pula saya lepak dgn ko. Teruk kan. But I know you're a good man. I apologize for not hanging around much with you. I do want to thank you for one thing. Hari tu sa ada minta tlg ko utk washing of the feet time di mass. Sa betul2 desperate suda tu. REALLY REALLY REALLY appreciate ur help.

Thanks again, Sapel! All the best in life and ROCK ON!



Milton Scolfield

Mil, its been years since I've kept this from you. First time yg kita jumpa d Bukit Batu tu, sa betul2 terasa dgn ko punya komen ho. AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA... Sa xtidur 3 mlm ba mok prepare utk WWF time tu. Suda la time tu sa Vice Director and director kami time tu lepas tangan saja. But thats all in the past.

No doubt we've been through a lot. I'm proud to say that when everything falls around me, burnt to the ground, and if there's 1 name I should call to my assistance here in JB, without a doubt, I'll call you. ahahahaha..... The incident 2009 Sept, u were there. Thats when I vowed whenever this Scolfield wanna be asks me for anything, I'll give him no matter what! ahahahahahahaha...

Salt 1 was when I really got to know you as a person. GIFT 21st Dinner, I hand pick u to help me. Sa ingat lagi a few days before dinner, kita 2 kluar, ko tanya mana ada beli iron rambut. Sa buat muka FROG suda, den ko expalin trus sa bawa ko pi Giant. ahahahahhaha..... I really wanna go on but it'll be boring for the others later. ahahahaaha...

Ko bnyk buka mata sa la, Mil. Thanks again for everything. I pray your life will be smooth by His hands and you live a Salt-ful life...



Walton my friend, my fiance, my darling!

This is 1 freaking cute pokemon is d disco light of every Gift event! Bnyk yg kita lalui Ton. Sa paling ingat la tym kita pigi Cameroon Highlands. Sa xtau tapi ko melekat dgn sa mcm anak munyit nie. Sa pikir, gini pula rasa ada adik lelaki. RIMAS NIE! tapi best... mmg best! sbb sa rasa sa diperlukan, dgn sa rasa dihargai.

Tiap kali kita jumpa, JIIIIMMMMMMM....... gitu ko panggil sa. Waaaa.... dlm hati sa, ada juga org sayang sa :) U make me forget my worldly problem. Ko buli buat sa senyum w/pun tu hari sa rasa sa buli bunuh Godzilla dgn kemarahan sa! ahahahahaha...

Sa ingat lagi kita pigi KL time CNY tu kan... Punya la sempit tidur d Hotel 13 org... AHAHHAHAHHA... tpi, AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sana la bru dpt rasa ke best-an jalan2 dgn geng2 yg SPORTING tahap Dubai Tower.

Anyways, REALLY hope u'll continue master here! Ahahahaha... I won't say goodbye to u yet!



Constant Cook bin Lambert

Ni lagi satu artis sa jarang lepak dgn. Sorry, Sir Cons John. ahahahaha Mcm2 nama sa bagi ko. Tpi yg penting nama artis popular! Sorry din have much memories to share with you. Theres only 1 time I think we worked together. For GIFT 21st dinner if i'm not mistaken. U agreed to sing for the presentation show. OMG! Sa terharu owh... ahahahahha...

Apa2 pun, keep on singing to the world and spread your faith along the way! Godspeed, Consjo!



Valerie, A Calm Rose

Val, theres a lot of thing I want to pick with you! I'm so mad at YOU! Just joking... Well, mcm smua org, sa langsung tidak ingat bila kita first jumpa. I'm also sad that we didn't hang out that much. You were the treasurer for Gift 21st Dinner, sa pun rasa happy ko dpt tlg. Lepas tu sa assist Dinner MJCC ko, waaa best ho! Kinda miss out on a lot of things with you.

Apa2 pun, take care in the future Val! An honor getting to be your acquaintance...



Freddie Junior (Gemuk)

Ni la junior paling jarang jumpa. Maklumlah... Model part time! ahahahaha... Congrates on your third pace dlm pertandingan di CS hari tu! ahahahahaahahahha God Bless you in the future, Bro!



Bath Mariah Carey James @ BMCJ

This one HOT MAMMA is a freaking SEXY LADY GAGA! ahahahaha... Nice to meet you, Mariah! Mula2 aku kenal ko, nang rasa mok terajang sampe laut antartika ajak. Mala jak palu' aku! I mean, WHAT THE VUCK MAN? Ahahahaha... but then, of course la I got to know you .

Aku paling hutang budi dgn ko masa ko tlg choreograph AWESOME DANCE utk Gift dinner ya! NANG AWESOME BEYOND Charice! Ko dapat ctrl smua penari2 ko! I was hoping to see the same dance for Inter Campus Gathering kat Majodi hari ya tapi... Sedih ku MJCC kena booo hari ya.

Bath, gona miss the singing times with you... But I wont say goodbye yet. Wanna see you when you continue your masters degree so we can settle once and for all, who is the better singer. Andrea Bocelli atau Celine Dion! ahahahhhahahahaha.....



Alister the Allstar!

You're one helluva guy! Started the nipple pinching franchise! ahahahaha... Aku akan slalu ingat 'kemutan-mu' di bahagian puting Sheldon. ahahahha.... Sorry for not spending more time with you, dude.

No matter what, u'll always be in my prayer and everytime I see a nipple pinching act. But still no good bye cause I heard you're continuing masters degree. Until then, ANOTHER PINCH! >0< ----Aksi mencubit nenen Yaw dlm virtual world!



My Sister Stepi

Hi Stepi, pa kabar ko? Ko la antara junior yg simpan black file aku. Ahahahaha... went through a lot with u. 2 family vacation, Battle of d band lagi... Ahahahaha... Just dont know where to start. You are a very energetic lady. Most of the time xdpt ctrl but dgn ko, smua aktiviti nampak awesome!

Last sem was a short one but its d one I'll remember most because we were so close. Family vacation to Johor Lama was so best! Huhuhuhuhuhu... Just cant imagine a better day than that! I just couldn't think that things would turn out like... now. I'm sad this semester, we were not so close. I understand you busy schedule. Just hoped we could hang out more.

I like to think that I do watch out for you. For every words I say that hurt you, I did that on purpose. A calculated effect so you get hurt by me and not make the wrong choice. U understand what I mean. I was a bit sad u went back without even telling me. And you plan to get engaged within the next few weeks. But I'm sure you have your own reasons and I respect your decisions. I miss the days we hang out together :)

But above all, you'll always be my little sister. And here's something for you:

Another tears another smile,
Be free be a butterfly,

Kiss the wind kiss the sun,
Never regret never run,

But if ever u need me,
Here, I'll always be...



Bunga the Flower

Of all the juniors, I clearly remember the first time I met you. It was on a saturday after mass and I came back from Semester Holiday. The others keep telling "Jim, kau ada junior yang HOT!" and I was what the VUCK??? ahahahahahaha... I was excited and search la any lady dgn rupa Jessica Alba atau Zhang Zi Yi... Then they pointed at you. I was like, benar ka cdak tok? This is a primary school kid la... Sbb ko kecik ba time ya. Aahahahahahha.....

Den utk 3 thn berturut-turut, kita sama team utk WWF kan? ahahaha Rekod dunia yaa.... xda gk org pernah 3 thn mcm kita! U r FREAKING AWESOME! Mun mbak gi jalan2 aok jak... aahahahahahha... All the best in life, Flower! HIDUP FIZIK INDUZTRI!



Virginy the Name Confuser!

GINY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ko nang seksi tpi aku stress sikin mun klua dgn ko. GINY! JIMMY! Ejaan nang jauh tapi SEBUTAN NYA 99.99999999% sama! ahahahahahahhaha... Aku ingat gk dolok first year sblum mass, tiba2 ada org call aku. Jim, ada org mengekori kami. Tolong ambil di CIMB BANK! Aku punya nebes, trus mbak Cam dgn Freddie dgn Ging nait keta ku gi sambut torang! Aduhai... menangis da ko time ya. Aku rasa mok tukar jadi hulk jak time ya!

Apa2 pun, 4 years is a short time la... CNY time ko first year dgn 2nd year kita parti2 d blakang KTR nun... ahahahaha.. Ko masak smua lauk ada belacan! WAT D VUCK! ahahahahha... terpaksa skip lauk2 ko ya! ahahahahahha... I really en joy life with you. All the best and MUN KAWIN, MESTI JEMPUT AKU!



Momon the Mimi Hugger

Na! nama seksi ko sini! ahahahahah... Cam, its been 4 years. U're a strong guy, big heart and caring dgn kawan2 ko. Ko boleh jaga org yg lagi tua dari ko. Ko bagi support yang teda berbelah bagi!

Tapi what I freaking love about you is although ko ada smua ciri2 awsome di atas, ko masi manja dgn sa... Kadang2, dari jau suda sa dengar MIMIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lepas tu ka datang peluk sa dan sa picit nenen ko! MMG GAY la kita but waht the VUCK man! WHO CARES! Yg penting, sa gembira, ko gembira dan kita hugging di khalayak ramai tanpa rasa mau! ahahahahaha... All the best in life, Cam! Simpan tu nenen ko utk sa cubit lagi! ahahahahhaha... HUGSSSSSSSS!



Thats all I think.. Just wanna say a few words to you all can ka? Kalau xboleh pun I still mok cakap!

The working world is a jungle, a cut throat place, a dog eat dog world. Don't reduce to them. We are GIFTERS! The Salt of the world. We are here to make changes, so others may live a happy life.

Be grateful. No other batch ada farewell party macam kamu. Ahahaha... Smoga kamu tidak lupa mereka yg susah payah.

If you are to return back and pursue masters, atau kerja sini, please continue to be active in GIFT and not drift away. Life will get in the way but remember the seniors who took care of you before, now its your time to return it to our future juniors!



All the best in life and PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE help to spread Punggekism Ideology! ahahahahahaha... GOD BLESS!